


Sarcastic Affair

by Ritzy_bird



Series: Jearmin Week 2019 [3]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, thot armin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-09
Updated: 2019-08-09
Packaged: 2020-08-13 05:08:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20168665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ritzy_bird/pseuds/Ritzy_bird
Summary: Jearmin Week 2019 Day 3: Summer NightsArmin's stranded at a hotel in a big city he doesn't know, heartbroken, lonely, and most importantly: Bored.Jean's first job was as a hotel lifeguard, and he's been one ever since. Getting to see attractive men and women from all over the world in skimpy bathing suits, though? Worth every boring moment.Maybe they could help each other out.





	Sarcastic Affair

**Author's Note:**

> Thot Armin incoming

**This wouldn't be the first time, but;**

"God, I'm so _stupid_!"   
  
This was supposed to be Armin's vacation, but instead it was more like a prison sentence.  
  
"_Yeah, that's all you've been saying this entire week; And I keep telling you it's not your fault._" Mikasa had been telling him _that_ the whole time.

"Wait," Armin whispered, adjusting his sunglasses nonchalantly, "I think... the life guard looked at me."

"_He's a life guard, you're at the pool! What else is he gonna do, stare at the water_?" Eren scoffed, no doubt eager to get back on topic.  
  
"I don't know? His phone? It's the same one as last time." Over the course of his vacation, Armin had spent a lot of time at the hotel pool.

"_Oh! You have to take a picture of him this time-- Is he cute?_"

"_Who cares if he's cute!? Armin you need to gimme permission to handle your ex_."

"Stop being dramatic!" Armin hissed, "And how do you expect me to take a picture of him? There's _no one_ else at the pool right now."

"_You never pretend you're taking a selfie when you're _really_ just trying to get a good look at someone with your front camera's zoom? You can take a picture like that._" 

Armin forced himself not to scrunch his face up.

"_Enough! You both are always going after these idiots that make you cry! Speaking of; I really wish one of you would just __give me your ex's addresses so I can fly out there myself and kill 'em_."

"You're both _insane_! I'll call you back later." Armin huffed, lifting his sunglasses up as he glanced towards the lifeguard's chair.

Catching Armin's eye, he returned the gesture; Taking off his own sunglasses and making eye contact.

"_Wait, later whe--_"  
"_I was just jok--_"

Armin tapped the end call button, tossed his phone and glasses down, then slid out of his chair. It was time for a swim.

He went under immediately, swimming to the far end of the pool. The lifeguard must have been watching the whole time-- _Exactly_ what Armin wanted.

"Hey!" Armin called up as he emerged from the deep end, grabbing onto the edge of the pool.

They smiled, sitting up in their chair and looking around before climbing down to walk over. "You alright there...?"

Armin nodded, "Mhmm. I... I'm Armin!"

The lifeguard leaned down, turning away slightly to avoid the sun, "Well uhm, I'm Jean. 'S'nice to meet you." He forced himself to make eye contact, his hazel eyes highlighted by the sun.

"...Yeah!" 

This might be nice.

*

"So, how long've you been doing this?" Armin surveyed the pool, pleased they were still alone.

"What, keeping rich people from drowning? Pfftch! Forever, I guess."  
  
"Oh?" Armin looked back up at him, flicking some water into the air with his feet. "So... do you have any, y'know, tan lines?" He wasn't going to mention that he'd tanned _religiously_ before making his trip- A feeble attempt at looking less pasty in front of his now-ex, and with little success.

Jean chewed the side of his mouth for a moment, shrugging. "Mmm, _y'know_." This wasn't exactly Baywatch. He clearly had an umbrella on his chair to keep the sun _off_ of him.

"What do you mean '_y'know_'?"

"I mean..." Jean made direct eye contact, trying to keep his smirk to a minimum. "D'you want me to show you?"

Armin only giggled and looked away.

*

"I see you out here a lot. You like swimming?" Jean realized too late it might sound like he'd been watching Armin, and hoped he'd been casual enough about it.

"Dunno. 'Just wish there was more to do out here, but, I've been _stuck_ in this hotel for almost my whole vacation." Armin said, unable to hide his frown.  
  
"What? This is a _big_ city, there's, there's _tons_ to do! I could, _hmm_, show you a few things, if ya want. How long're you here for?" 

Armin knew how he could take that, "Well, I was supposed to be doing a bunch of stuff with my boyfriend, but, well.... It doesn't matter, he's just not who he said he was."

Jean's eyebrows raised, and he lightly punched his own palm in exaggeration, "Heart breaker, huh? Want me to go rough him up for ya?"

"Hahahaha! I, y'know what? I've got a friend you'd probably really get along with." 

"Oh yeah...? Seems like we're getting along just fine." 

Sly. _Very_ sly. But Armin kind of liked that, and his blushes were starting to morph into something else entirely with every suggestion.

*

"I just don't know how he fooled me! You know what I mean? Like, I'm the _smartest_ guy I know." Armin saw the way Jean's face changed at that, and quickly tried to back peddle.

"_I mean_, I know me, y'know? I know _better_ than to just... let myself be manipulated like this."

Jean nodded, "No, no I get it. But hey, at least he flew you out here, right? Set you up in a _nice_ hotel. Heh." Had he just accidentally implied Armin looked poor? Oops.

"_Unfortunately_," Armin pouted, seemingly oblivious to the possible implication. "I had to pay for everything myself." With a little help from others, but, that wasn't important.

"Damn! What a dick. That's why, ah, you can't really trust everyone online, right?" A few too many swipes on Tinder taught Jean that.

Armin's head bobbed back and forth a little, weighing his thoughts. Eren and Mikasa were his two greatest friends in the world. Kind of his only friends, actually, and he met both of them online. 

"I guess. I was _convinced_ I was in love with the guy, it's ridiculous. I just wanted someone, nice, y'know? Someone...."

Jean smirked, "_I just want a guy who's honest_!" His high pitched mocking tone had Armin mimicking the same face right back at him, thankfully.

"Well, how honest are _you_?"

Eyes wide, lit with a spark of pride, Jean leaned his head down slightly, "Actually? I'm the most _honest_ guy I know." He spoke low too, and as much as he wanted to wink, he'd thought better of it.

"Mhmm. Sure." Armin quickly flicked some water up at Jean, swimming slowly away along the wall.

*

Jean looked at his watch, and noticed the pool would be closing soon. They'd been talking on and off for hours now! The sun may still be up, but he still only had until seven to make his move. 

"So what are you doing tonight?

Armin, looked up at the sky, blowing air out of his nose with frustration.

"Tonight, me and my _stupid_ ex were supposed to go out, have a nice fancy dinner at this over priced _winery_, come home an' have lots of 'super romantic' sex. _God_ it's been... do you have any idea how long it's been since I've done that? But, ahaha, yeah, those plans are _cancelled_!"

Jean's ears perked, "Oh?"

"Yeah so, what about you?" Armin turned, "Anything fun?"

"I've got a few ideas," Jean leaned in closer, their shoulders practically touching.  
  
Armin was no fool, breathing out heavily, "Here...?"

Jean snickered, leaning away and shaking his head. "No, haha, we'd get caught!" Though he had done it before.

"Well, you're no fun." Armin gently slapped him, not nearly hard enough for it to hurt. He'd save all the pain for later.

"I am _plenty_ fun." Jean insisted, laying on a blatantly seductive tone that he'd been waiting to let loose for a _while_ now.

Armin immediately began swimming away, the only thing that could hide the blush on his face long enough for him to think of a response. 

Jean kept staring, however, as Armin exited the pool. Watching carefully, studying his body language.... Looking for a sign of success.

Once he'd gathered what few things he'd brought with him to the pool, Armin turned. It was only _just_ enough so that Jean could hear him when he said, "I'm room 305."  
*  
As soon as his shift had officially ended, the sun just beginning to disappear behind the skyline, Jean had made his way up to the third floor. There'd been times where he'd been led on, given fake numbers.  
  
He knocked on the door twice, _gently_, with one of his knuckles, and waited. 

It opened just a crack, enough to see the teasing stare of one of Armin's gorgeous blue eyes.  
*  
"Really!? _Again_!? Jean wake the _hell_ up--"

Startled awake, Jean looked up at his favorite co-worker, Sasha.  
  
"This room was checked out hours ago. You promised this wouldn't happen again! You're lucky I'm cleaning this floor today."

"_Sorry_...." Jean was quick to slip his clothes back on, looking around the room for any sign of Armin.

He remembered pulling on his silky smooth hair, and the sharpness of Armin's short, manicured nails. His warm skin, and the soft, _sloppy_, wet kisses he gave any time Jean said something sweet. All of that and... Armin was just gone?

The room had been completely cleared out of Armin's things, save for a box containing one of those giant Hershey Kisses on the night stand. A yellow sticky-note was slapped onto the side of it:  
  
_-Got this for my ex. _  
_Guess it's yours now_

Jean chewed on his bottom lip, huffing out what would've been a laugh.  
  
"Hey you need to _go_! Seriously, we're both gonna be fired!" Sasha hissed, hands on her hips.

"Yeah, yeah...." He swiped the box off the table, slipped his sandals back on, and marched on out. Sasha would have slammed the door behind him, if only it wouldn't disturb the other guests.

Walk of shame? Never.

He noticed some writing fading through the other side of the note, and paused to look it over. Seven digits, and:

_-remember where I'm from? _

The numbers were a phone number- _with no area code_! 

Jean shook his head, smile widening, growing into laughter as he continued to make his way down the hallway.

**Maybe, it was the last time.**

**Author's Note:**

> This was going to be a little different, a little LONGER, but after Forbidden Relationship I really needed a short, happy story. I really wanted to write porn but that would have taken too long :(


End file.
